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Not that it matters to anyone else but I've been having a tough time winning tennis matches the last couple of weeks. I've been winning but mostly my opponents have either not played well, picked up a minor injury during the match, or were somewhat out of practice. I had one good match and while I started well, winning the first set 6-1, I missed several chances to get a big advantage in the second set and wound up losing it as well as the third set. It was a depressing loss, not only because it was a finals match for a small winter league but also because of how it played out.
So I find myself serving down 1-2 in another match and not feeling strong. Again, I had won the first second, lost a fight for the second set, and appeared to be set to fold again. My first thoughts were I was a terrible player and just weak and ready to lose. The first two points of the game went against me and those negative thoughts got stronger.
At that point, I stepped back and just took a little breath. I reminded myself that sure, I probably couldn't win the match on my own but I didn't HAVE to win the match on my own. What I needed to do is just let my inner self play the match and just get out of the way. Heck, I didn't even know how to play tennis (or even breath for that matter) but I was cheeky enough to think that this same 'I' could win this tennis match. Every year I need to relearn that lesson. Funny, isn't it? Anyway, I just said my little prayer and just put the match into it's hands. There's a level of belief and trust and just letting go which requires some practice. Can't fake out the thing that can't be faked out. It knows and can't be lied to.
Finished up the set 6-3 and walked away with the match. Wasn't me. Don't know what it is but it wasn't me.
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